Time struck me again last night. I am not at all afraid or sad to turn 30 next month, but I am getting very anxious to get settled. We just moved into a new apartment and there is a part of me that cannot wait until I move and actually live in a place where we'll both have jobs and a home that we can settle into...even if it is for one or two years. I have promised myself multiple times in the past to not waste a moment of time. I have missed many opportunities because I looked at my situation as temporary. I must take advantage of this year...possibly our last in Cincinnati.
I look back and often laugh at how "old" my mom was when she had me. I'm from rural Wisconsin, so her having me when she was 28 made her 10 years older than all of my friends' moms. Her birthday is today and I am proud that I got a card sent out in time! When I was 25 or 26, it hit me that I may be 28 when I have kids, and then I turned 28; that was the hardest birthday that I ever had to celebrate. 30 is not bad, but I am now wondering when or if we'll ever have kids.
I was brought to tears last night as I pondered our possible futures. Everyone keeps telling me how smart and great I am for getting my schooling out of the way before having kids, but it is a struggle for me since I am not obsessed about my career. Don't get me wrong, I cannot wait to work as a nurse and actually work in a hospital with my own patients, but having children has to be much more amazing. I hope I do not have to wait too long...
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